In continuing from where we stopped, I will be sharing with you some essentials on building a successful relationship.
Six Essentials on Building a Successful Relationship
1. Founded in Christ
Someone may ask “what’s the relationship between my relationship my relationship and it been founded in Christ?” well, there is a positive relationship between your relationship and it been founded in Christ.
What does it mean for your relationship to be founded in Christ? It simply means for your relationship to be founded on the principles, practices, values and beliefs of God’s Word.
Why is it important for my relationship to be founded in Christ? it is important because in every relationship we keep we are dealing with a human and because of our character flaws and inadequacies, it is easier for a believer’s character to be worked upon by the Holy Spirit so that the character of Jesus can be revealed in him/her.
This gives room for both parties in a relationship to easily deal with any character flaws so that it doesn’t affect the relationship. It is much easier for two believers in a relationship to deal with their character flaws than for two unbelievers in a relationship because of the work of the Holy Spirit in the life of the believers as they yield themselves to His leading.
To build a successful relationship, it is very important that the relationship is founded in Christ.
What gives value to our relationship is Jesus.
A foundation that is not laid on Christ is laid on something broken. Jesus made mention of two types of builders in Matthew 7: 27-28 – The wise and foolish builders. The wise builder builds his foundation on the rock (Jesus), when storm, rain came and beat against the house it did not fall but the man the man that built on sand, when the rain and storm came and beat against that house it fell with a great crash.
These very words of Jesus portrays one major reason why some persons are never successful in building a relationship. Any relationship that has never been tested can’t yet be proven to say it’s a successful one.
Any foundation that is not founded on the principles, practices, values and beliefs of God’s Word when the storm comes it would not be able to stand. The pressure from the world becomes too much for it to stand.
In your relationship don’t be shy to implement principles and practices that can help your relationship to grow. Don’t be shy to study God’s word together, don’t be shy to pray together and other godly principles that are hygienic to the growth of your relationship.
Friends who pray together stay together. Initiating these things from the onset of the relationship would be lot easier than starting them after the relationship must have gone far. When you give priority to the Word and prayer, they will make your relationship effective.
In any relationship, never get so familiar with you friend(s) to the point where you lose sight of their true value.
These is very common in most relationship especially in a marriage relationship. Both partners can sometimes become so use to each other that nothing the wife does that seems to catches the attention of the husband and nothing the husband does that looks interesting to the wife anymore.
This is really a bad state to be in. familiarity comes because we think we have seen or known the person so well that nothing they can do or will do that seems new to us.
This is something that also happens also in a Pastor-Member relationship. Some members have become so “use” to their Pastors that to them there is nothing new the Pastor wants to say or do that they have not heard before, to the point where the pastor gives instruction and they feel reluctant in carrying it out.
Value your relationship, appreciate every of their acts of kindness to you. Tell them sometimes how special they are to you. Send a text message to them, do a written note to them, just do something you have not done and keep doing just that to make sure you don’t get too familiar with them. Not just so as not to get too familiar with them but also to show how much you appreciate them been with you.
There is something I noticed and I’m sure you too have noticed it also, it’s not just the guys that does it, ladies do it but for the sake of simplicity, let’s assume that it’s just the guys that does it.
Why is it that when a guy meets a lady for the first time and they get along, the guy tries to do everything possible to please or impress this lady, sometimes the guy even talk ‘spoil’ just to make her laugh but as soon as the guy thinks he has gained ground in that relationship he stops doing those things he use to do when they first met.
If she tells the guy to crack a joke or say something funny, the guy looks at her and say “am I a comedian”. Before when the girl coughs the guy quickly respond but now “who cares” he says to himself.
Too much familiarity. Relationship that will stand the test of time, both parties must never be familiar with each other to the point were they don’t see each other’s values.
To be continue…
Link to Part 1